Another special thanks?

Including more Earthloop dialogue, and a new character.

A day ago I posted a special thanks to whoever purchased a paperback of WHO BUILT THE HUMANS? through Amazon.

Since then my Amazon updated and two more copies have gone. I joked with my mum (Hi mum) that I could post a special thanks and new excerpt from Earthloop every time one sells. Obviously, this won’t happen, it would very quickly become spammy. What I will do instead is post this thank you note, include another Earthloop spoiler, and give you some minor news below it.

In the future, all Earthloop stuff will be in the Earthloop tab.

Today’s Earthloop tune.

Thunder crashed behind them, casting picosecond silhouettes of distant offices and high-rise apartments. As the rain lashed down, Lax inhaled the metallic scent of a bigger storm on the horizon.

“I brought you here,” Fixer shouted across the rooftop, “because I knew who you were. The treasure hunting Atanattat brothers. You went missing in your little makeshift spaceship. Just how did your brother manage to get those four things to work as one?”

Lax didn’t answer. It was a strategic silence. The longer he waited, the more likely it was that Fixer would let slip some piece of information he could use against her later. Fixer stepped closer to him, not caring that at this distance the Atanattat could easily catch her and throw her off the roof.

“I know you know what I’m talking about Lax. Your ship broke up in the timestreams. You remember following a distress signal to this planet, hoping that the mystery of its displacement would one day lead you back to your brothers. You thought someone was meddling with time, with Earth, and so you came here.”

Again, no reply from Lax Morales.

“I sent that distress signal Lax. Right at the end of the time loop. July 2016. You landed in 1950.

“Why?”

“Because I want your technology. The timeships aren’t ours, and every timeship is different. Each one has memories. The one you were piloting remembers something very important to me.”

(This might not be canon yet, but it is fun).

---

Finding a direction

I posted a comedy article earlier today. It got more likes than most, but also resulted in 9 people unsubscribing. It’s difficult to know what to think of this. I’m used to splitting an audience in a writing workshop, but not online. I don’t mind people shaking their heads when I’m on stage, but losing subscribers here makes you feel like you’ve done something wrong. This writing thing is my job. Ideally I’d have an exit questionnaire.

I was originally going to put a poll in that comedy post. The poll was going to ask if the comedy content should be (1) built-in to this newsletter, (2) an additional opt-in thing, or (3) its own separate Substack. I decided not to ask in the end because I realised I was continuing my old tradition of keeping my sci-fi and comedy separate, a practice which is entirely pointless if you’ve read WBTH, and which has held me back before.

The comedy has been opt-in for a while now, but if you have thoughts about that, let me know.

My favourite review (not really a review, something someone said to me in the basement of a pub) was “You’re like Frankie Boyle but for weird sci-fi poetry”. I was told that after reading a slice of WBTH to an open mic crowd. I held onto that review during the pandemic that followed. Frankie is one of my favourite writers, and I think many people miss how skilled he is because they focus on the darker edges of his work, not the machinery that makes it all function.

If you’re new to this newsletter and enjoyed the comedy, let me know.

And here’s some more, in which Barry Binbag tries to disprove the existence of dogs.

---

So I’m an author, a comedian, a poet, and some other stuff.

The question is, what do people want from this Substack?

If you have any ideas, the comments are open.

-Phillip